Being heartbroken doesn’t mean we’re powerless.

These are not easy days.

I wake up feeling the heaviness of voices silenced, communities threatened, policies unraveling progress, cruelty cloaked as law, and truths twisted. For those of us who feel deeply, it’s easy to spiral into despair.

Here’s the truth:

Our “not-okayness” doesn’t mean we’re weak. Our feelings are reminders that we care. That we see.

That we haven’t numbed ourselves.

What if we make peace with the mess we might be feeling from within? What if we let go of pretending that we’re just “fine?”

As I was drafting the book Heart-Dreamer: Stepping into Life, Love, Creativity, and Dreams – No Matter What, an insightful whisper from the universe came through me:

“We don’t have to fix our brokenness. Sometimes, just sitting beside our sorrow is the bravest act of all.”

We can feel both the shadow and the light of our feelings and be okay with all of it. We can be passionate activists, dreamers, peace seekers, creatives, and light workers, and at the same time, we can acknowledge all the painful inner waves of grief, fatigue, confusion, uncertainty, and anger.

We can feel raw, tender, depressed, lost, and disillusioned, and within that mess, still put one foot in front of the other and move forward with the only healing energy that matters: Love.

There is healing power in sitting with our pain, an art to being okay with not being okay, and strength in letting ourselves move into and through it all.

In my own life, and in the lives of those I’ve coached or sung to, I’ve seen how healing begins when we stop running from pain. When we name what hurts and allow ourselves to be present with those feelings, something magically sacred unfolds.

A softening. A shift of heart.

“It is never too late to step into a new purpose, mission, and dream for yourself and for the world.” ~ Peace Dreamer: A Journey of Hope in Bad Times and Good

Emotions like sadness and fear are often labeled as signs of weakness and failure. I see them differently. They are the vibration of aliveness.

Each feeling is an imprint of a soul that still cares, still hopes, and still shows up.

“How do I stay okay when everything is wrong?” can be reshaped into a question that asks, “How do I stay grounded, kind, and compassionate even when life is at its worst?”

Replenish yourself in whatever way you need. Rest and then rise. When you are finished resting, meditating, praying, and walking in nature, use that positive energy to give to others.

>> Smile at a stranger.

>> Join peaceful protests.

>> Call your representatives.

>> Network with like-minded people.

>> Attend town hall meetings.

>> Inspire others with your positive words, art, songs, and the energy of light, love, peace, and hope.

Honor exactly who you are in each moment and know that within that moment there are always opportunities for love, gratefulness, laughter, personal transformation, and rebirth. When we honor the whole range of feelings that swirl inside us, we reclaim our wholeness.

Use the life coaching tool of “inner talk” to love yourself through the ebb and flow of every feeling.

Tell yourself:

>> I am not right or wrong for feeling this.

>> I am not ahead or behind.

>> I am not broken or unbroken.

>> I am not standing still or becoming.

>> I am neither okay nor not okay. I just am.

>> I am enough.

 I am an advocate for:

>> People who find themselves crying in their car, and after releasing these feelings, they reach out to others with a steady flow of love.

>> People who wake up with cracked hearts but still attend a peaceful protest with their passion and poster in hand.

>> People who don’t look at errands as ordinary. They look at them as opportunities to connect with strangers, using kindness and the promise of peace and common ground as their inner mantras.

>> People who know that they can’t fix the world but keep offering their light and love anyways.

We need each other more than ever now. We need the ones who are playful, innocent, loving, kind, peaceful, and grateful, and we also need the same beautiful human being who takes a moment to pause, to grieve, and to feel heartbroken.

The news feels like a daily assault on the soul, making even the most courageous to ask:

>> How can I be okay when the world is not?

>> How can I make peace with my own sadness, when so many are suffering?

The truth is that we may not be able to feel okay in the way we once did, but we can still be whole. We can still feel that we are enough just for being, breathing, and loving.

This time in our history is about showing up in all the sacred ways that matter. We don’t have to carry the whole world. We just have to carry our corner of it with tenderness, courage, grace, and strength.

As Holocaust survivor, Viktor Frankl said: “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”

Give yourself permission to be a perfectly imperfect human. If you’re weary of pretending that you’re just “fine,” let this be a permission slip for you: first, sit with your beautiful and messy self and give yourself a big loving hug.

Next, tell yourself:

>> I don’t have to be okay to be whole.

>> I don’t have to be perfect to be powerful.

>> I don’t have to be anyone else but me.

>> I don’t need to numb my grief to be strong.

>> I don’t need to hide my trembling to be steady.

Feeling overwhelmed doesn’t mean you’re failing. It just means you’re human. Allow yourself time to pause, grieve, inhale, and exhale.

By doing these random acts of kindness on yourself, you are also giving loving permission to all who are barely holding on right now. You are encouraging them to be okay with not being okay.

One more love note to my reader: Remember. When the world does its best to break your heart, your heart is not broken. It is breaking open to give and receive love.

~